So … I’m going through a rough time at the moment.
It was this time last year that my late wife, Dayna, was in the last stages of her cancer.
She passed away on November 9th, 2023. I was there with her. So was my youngest daughter, Lily.
I had been in the hospital room for a long time and had gone over to the cot to catch some sleep.
Lily came over to me at about 7:00 am to wake me up. Her mom (and my wife) had passed away during the night.
We sat and cried at her bedside for a full hour before we called the nurses in to let them know she had passed away.
Before Dayna died, a friend told us that it’s the second year, not the first, that is the most difficult. That’s what I’m experiencing now. The weather patterns, the light, the temperature outside … they’re all reminding me of this time last year when Dayna was slowly slipping away.
I’m doing a lot to try to cope with everything. Some of the techniques are helpful, others not so much. But I’m sharing them with you here in case they’ll be helpful to you.
Meditation: As always, I meditate every day. I tell people that prayer is talking to God and that meditation is listening to God. You’ve probably read my guide on how to meditate on the Unspoken Rules of Leadership website. If not, you can read it by clicking here.
Connecting with Friends: I live on a lake about an hour north of Atlanta. I’m blessed to be here, but it can be isolating, so I make sure to call friends and to do Zoom calls with my kids.
Exercise: I joke with my kids that I’ve done so much running lately that I’m wearing out my shoes at an accelerated rate. I’ve definitely found that exercise helps with sleep, self-esteem, focus, and resilience.
Medication: You’ll often hear me talk about meditation (with a T) to manage stress, but that doesn’t mean I ignore medication (with a C). As my daughters told me, sometimes your body needs a little help. So now I’m thinking of medication as something similar to wearing a cast when you break your arm. It can be temporary. And it can help you heal better.
The 4-7-8 Breathing Technique: When I sit down to meditate, I start with the 4-7-8 breathing technique. The secret for me with this technique is to do is slowly. The longer the breaths, the more it seems to stimulate my vagus nerve, which is the nerve that runs down your spine and induces relaxation. (Interested in learning more about this technique? Check out the video below.)
Those are the techniques I’m using at the moment. How about you? Let me know what you do to handle stress and anxiety — I’m open to any and all suggestions. 🙂
About the Author: Jamie Turner is an internationally recognized author, professor, consultant, and speaker who has helped employees at The Coca-Cola Company, Holiday Inn, Verizon, Mercedes-Benz and others do a better job leading, managing, and mentoring others. To have him speak at your event or organization, email him at: Jamie@JamieTurner.Live